I know there are some talented musicians out there who don’t get a lot of recognition, struggling in their careers, and not getting a lot of respect from the public. Look, I hear you, as I am in the same boat. I see musicians in facebook and other local music forums complaining about not getting a lot of respect for your playing or your songwriting. That’s not gonna get you the respect by complaining about it which I see musicians do, all the time. Even I complain about it at times and I gotta stop that. Complaining about it is just gonna turn people off and they’ll stop supporting you. I’ve made those mistakes myself. Complaining and ranting about lack of respect is not a good way to handle things.

How do you earn respect with your music? How do you get people to like you and support what you do? Simply put, just shut up and play the music. Keep writing the songs. Keep playing the gigs. Let the music speak on it’s own and the people will respond that way. Even if you keep doing both writing the songs and playing the gigs, you still get lack of respect… just keep going. You never know when people will respect you. Hell, you already maybe respected by everybody anyway and you’re not even realizing it?

People are not gonna support bad music, that’s all there is to it. If you make the good songs that people want to hear… people will support you. That’s how EBJ got there. EBJ got where they are today ’cause they are a well-respected band and they’re good songwriters which is how they get all these good opportunities and accolades. The same can happen to you if you keep going and work hard.

Respect is also earned… not only because of your musical talent and your hard work ethic — it is also earned through your professional behavior. People are sure not gonna support musicians who are assholes or douchebags. You must have a good professional acting behavior. Be good to people. Be down to earth and humble. It’s okay to be honest and real about stuff because people will respect you for that too but don’t be a jerk about things. A lot of musicians make the mistake that you can act how you want to and be yourself but most of the time you can’t if you want to be a respected musician. Think of being a musician like a day job. You know how on a day job, you must be on your best professional behavior? The same goes for your music if you want to get somewhere. People take the way musicians act seriously. I know from my own experience. Being friendly and positive will help get you somewhere.

I know… I used to be a badguy and an egomaniac in the past myself… so I’ll admit that I messed up a lot but learning from my past mistakes so I won’t do them again in the future. If you want people to respond to you positvely, then you must be positive at all times. I’m trying my best these days as you can clearly see, and I believe I’m doing better.

Yes, people will still talk negatively about you and you will still get haters no matter how positive you are but you just have to learn to ignore the critics… that will earn you respect too.

If you’re a musician or a songwriter who is being disrespected everywhere — there are ways to turn all that negative feedback into positive. That’s your job. Yelling at people saying, “Respect me”, is not gonna help. If you see a lot of people disrespecting you… maybe you need to work on your musical talent more. Focus on your instrument or singing more and try to improve. Work on your professional behavior skills. Work harder on your music and respect will come to you on it’s own that way.

People are real when it comes to local musicians for sure. Some folks mistakenly believe that music fans support musicians just to be polite and friendly. Part of that is true but there is more to it than that. The reason a lot of people support certain musicians and bands ’cause they believe their hard-work, good musicianship, and professional behavior is why the respect is well-earned. People don’t support musicians for no reason. They know the reasons why the respect is well-deserved.

I’m not saying that I am a well-respected musician but if I am, great, if I’m not, that’s great too. I’m just gonna keep playing my music and keep doing what I do. You don’t want to call yourself a “well-respected” musician either like so many musicians do out there. You need to let the people tell you that. Keep doing the music that makes you happy and who knows what may happen. Anything is possible.

Kev

I have been observing the way bands & musicians act in facebook when they have a new show coming up. Like a week before the show, they get all excited about it. They publicly express how they are so psyched to be playing the show and all that stuff. Then they go on and on about how they’re gonna go drinking and get themselves drunk after. A lot of bands and solo artists seem to be acting like this. You see it all over facebook. Whenever they have a show coming up, it all seems to be about themselves rather than respecting the fans excitement for the gig. A lot of them are all over their facebook music pages saying stuff like, “Ooooohhh, I can’t wait to play this gig, we’re gonna rock it and get drunk after.”… you get the idea, right? Yeah, the fans will eat it all up, give their facebook status’s about the show a bunch of thumbs-up.

It’s all crazy, I tell you. I never understood why bands go all crazy for their upcoming gigs. To me playing gigs is nothing really. You just go up and do it. Play it and get it over with. I don’t see how you can compare gigs to Disney World and other theme parks. Hey don’t me wrong! I love getting gigs. I just don’t go nuts over it like so many musicians do. I don’t really care.

The point I’m trying to make here is, I like making my shows about the people who come to see it. That’s how you want to promote yourself. You don’t want to come across looking like a selfish person. Getting all excited for your own gigs, makes it look like you’re jerking yourself off, ya know? What’s even worse that bands saying they’re gonna party after the gig is kind of a turn-off as well. Is that all this band is about is drinking or is it about the music?

When I promote my shows, I don’t act like a kid going to Disney World. I just put my stuff out there and see what happens. When bands act like this when they have shows coming up kind of shows their arrogance. These bands should be a little careful of how they promote themselves but they won’t. They like to act like selfish jackasses ’cause they know the fans eat it up and they love that attention with them.

If you want more people to come out. Want a bigger crowd and successful show, leave your ego at the door. Yes, people do take how you promote yourselves seriously. No doubt about it. Don’t get me wrong. There are bands who don’t act like selfish arrogant pricks; there are some who know how to promote themselves well but there’s not too many. The whole point is that these guys are always about “me, me, me” when it should be about the fans interest in coming out.

Instead of facebook status’s like, “Hey guys, we got a show coming up. We can’t wait for this, we’re psyched to play it and we got a great set planned for the night. We’re gonna rock this place.”… which I see bands posts often — how about more humble posts like, “Hey guys, we got a show coming up. If you have nothing going on, hope to see you at (this venue here). It’ll be great to see you there!”. See how that second facebook status is more kind and respectful to the fans? I’ve always tried my best to make my postings courteous and humble as possible when promoting my own shows. I never made the posts about me when it should be about them.

The fans don’t realize that bands are acting like arrogant pricks when promoting themselves ’cause you know how fans are! They’ll be supportive of their favorite bands no matter how they are or what they do. These fans will like everything they put up in facebook. I am not being jealous, just telling things like it is.

Also, you should let the music speak on it’s own when promoting your shows. A lot of bands also like to say how they’re gonna play a great show before that night which is a bad idea, in my opinion. Nothing wrong with saying that you have a great set planned and I understand it’s your way of trying to talk people into coming out but that’s the wrong way to go about doing it.

Bands promote however they want to and most of them promote themselves in the craziest ways. I understand you’re trying to get the word out and get people to come out to your shows the best you can but you must do it right and respectfully if you want to bring more people to your shows. It’s your job to get people interested in coming out. People are not going to come out if they are turned off by the way you promote yourselves online. I made those mistakes before myself.

Kev

Ever wonder why there’s so much drama in local music over the years? I have been a part of local music for over 10 years or more. Drama in the Capital Region of local music still happens to this day. Basically, it’s mostly musicians getting into heated debates and feuds online. They mostly argue about things that happen at their gigs. Somebody online rants about what happens at the gig, then other musicians join in. Then all of a sudden, a heated flame war explodes. I’ve seen it happen all the time. Still happens in facebook, craigslist musicians section, etc. Musicians like to debate about stuff at the gigs like if they feel if they’re getting ripped off by payment, musicians acting unprofessional, their sets getting cut short, bands simply not getting along, etc. All kinds of bullshit. Musicians will even go as far as swearing at each other, threaten violence and all kinds of name calling.

You see, here’s what I think it is…

A lot of musicians want to believe that they are good and talented players. Whatever they do: sing, play guitar, play bass, drums or other instruments. A lot of local musicians don’t like to be criticized by anybody. A lot of these musicians have this arrogant attitude about them. They want to think they are better and feel smarter than any other musician since this musician happens to be technically talented. If they feel that this other musician is below their level, they’re gonna get criticized by the pros. It’s not just that, even the talented pros gets criticized by other pros, not just the amateurs. One professional musician feels the need to be outspoken to others. They want to tell their side of the truth while others tell their side. That’s part of why heated flame wars online happen.

When one musician says something bad about another musician, then other people are gonna go, “Wah, wah wah, you can’t be talking bad about other musicians, this needs to be a positive music scene”, and all that stuff. Other people who are offended at heated flame wars will try to play babysitter and get them to stop but the other musicians won’t stop, they’ll keep the heated debate going. Both sides want to think they’re right on everything, ya know?

That’s the name of the game in local music, ya know? You’re going to meet a lot of musicians with arrogant, ego-driven attitudes — musicians who jerk themselves off with their self importance. They don’t like being ridiculed.

It’ll be nice if these musicians will shut up and play the music but they never will. I believe the main reason why there’s so much drama in local music is because musicians enjoy it. It is all about ego if you think about it. I’m not playing innocent victim in band drama. I had my share of starting band drama and hating on bands admittedly so all of this includes me as well. It is unfair how we are not allowed to be talking trash about other musicians & bands when we should be allowed to. It’s music. That’s what it’s here for! To criticize and give honest opinions! People can’t understand that but whatever! That’s the internet. It’s an open forum. There will be all kinds of crazy people, and back & forth hypocrisy everywhere. When one musician or people in the music scene calls you a badguy for talking trash about other musicians that makes them bad too ’cause they do the same thing when they talk trash about you and they think they have every right to. Isn’t it funny how this one musician can’t say what they want and others can? That’s the hypocrisy I’m talking about.

You can’t trust everybody in the music scene. You can’t believe in everybody you set your eyes upon. You never know if they don’t really like you when they pretend they do. Not everyone in the music scene is kind, trustworthy, and friendly. All the drama in local music over the years was the big reason why most popular local music forums have been shut down. Of course, I get blamed for drama in the music scene but it’s not true. All musicians had a hand in it.

The trick to keep going in music successfully and positively is ignoring all the bullshit. Ignore everything completely. If you want a good career, don’t let it get destroyed by other musicians. It’s not that other musicians are jealous, they just want to tell you their side of the truth that you’re nothing in music. It’s just an opinion, nothing more. You’re just like all musicians. You just want to play your music and get heard. Yes, when you get yourselves out there in the music world, you’re probably gonna get into feuds with other bands and musicians, all that drama stuff. Just don’t let it get to ya and stay above that stuff. It’s sad that musicians don’t get along well over some silly online stuff but it is what it is.

Musicians get so hung up in drama ’cause it helps boosts their ego even more, period. That’s why they enjoy it.

Kev